Den you will be in my prayers, congrats on the 4 months sober and a bigger congrats on not drinking over what is up with your family right now.
My wife told me her and the kids were gone in a month just before I went into detox, I told here I was going into detox and she told me it may be to late, that she would see how I did. So I went into detox not knowing if I would have a family or not when I got out. The key for me was I knew I had to get sober or die, family or not, I was at the end, I knew when I went into detox that I had to stay sober, family or not!
When I came home from detox they were still there, I told them I was going to AA to stay sober, my wife told me that she offered no gaurantee that we would stay together whether I stayed sober or not. At that point I thought about buying a 12 pack but I had made the decision that I was willing to do anything to stay sober, I went to over 90 AA meetings in 90 days and got a sponsor as they suggested I do in detox.
I credit the fellowship of AA and the program for my sobriety, the salvation of my marriage, the freedom I have today from the obsession for alcohol, and the person I am today.