The hardest and yet the best thing Mr. M and I ever did was to detached from our active using AD. We have the rest of our family intact and now that AD is acting clean, she really appreciates that we are. She told us that she was so very grateful to us and to God that we didn't allow her stupid decisions to ruin our lives. She said she doesn't know what she would have done if there was nothing to come back to! I never thought about that then but I sure do now.
We gave her her life and the decisions and consequences that go with it. Since she could not live in our lives with us with decent behavior, she had to go and make her own way. Apparently, she found out that her way was not working.
But she never would have found out if we hadn't let her.
Hugs and good luck,
Marteen
Remember, what she does is NOT something you can control. You can only control how much her behavior controls YOU.