welcome to S.R... you are in the right place to get help with your problem," loving an addict". you can not help him & the sooner he hits his bottom maybe he will get the help he needs. he has got to want the help. he thinks as of now he has no drug problem. my son is my addict & as much as i love him i can not love him clean only to death. i realized by picking him up every time he fell i was just putting off his time of getting clean.you did not CAUSE it,you can not CONTROL it & you can not CURE it. those are the 3c's. i do not feel guilty when it comes to my son. he has got to do it all himself.nikki, learn to take care of you & leave him to his own recovery. he is not ready & i personally would not wait for him to clean up. he may never get clean. that is the sad part. sending prayers up for you both.hugs, hope