The key is that WE don't put ourselves 2nd. The drugs/alcohol will do that to our qualifier. We are the only ones who can put ourselves second in our own lives if we dwell on them. Long ago I gave up the inquiry process about what caused it and taking blame. No need to beat myself up as AS's addiction already had me on the ropes. Though this is natural process for Mom's when we first learn that our sons + daughters are addicts.Something we have to work through in our own recovery to heal ourselves.
I do believe at this time that my AS is headed for doom. I think he is relapsing in a big way which is getting bigger. I will need to make some hard choices real soon if he will be allowed to cont. to live w/ me since he has been back for 3 1/2 mos. There is NO quick road to recovey for him.