Claudia- pajarito means "little bird" in spanish. You got the pronunciation right! I tried "butterfly" when I signed up here- but of course it was taken. Little bird seemed good too, though- a little bird on my shoulder- my little voice- telling me to trust my gut and keeping me on track.
Good for you getting the jewels from your ex- and feeling ok about it. I am wondering about my ring- which is a Sapphire. I love the stone, but feel funny about taking the ring apart. This situation is all so fresh right now, that I really can barely stand to think about it. I feel like I am taking baby steps still. I'm putting the ring away for later when I can deal with it. And my poor hand feels so weird without the ring that I have taken to wearing crazy rings I used to wear before I got married- glass, metal with big glass stones. I feel like I'm calling attention to it, but I also feel like I need a replacement- maybe on another finger? <<<sigh>>> So much to think about.
I talked to my therapist yesterday about divorce. She talked about the loss of dreams. I think that's the biggest part of my sadness. No one grows up thinking they'll marry an A and get divorced. It feels like such a big failure. She asked me how old I am- 44. She told me to get on with my life- and she's not usually so up front about things- she waits for me to come upon them on my own. It's been 9 years since things started to go down hill. Nine years is a long time to wait for my AH to be the man I thought he was. In the meantime I have become someone I don't want to be- so I have a lot of work to do.
Detachme9- I am right there with you on the emotional rollercoaster- wandering around among the memories. The only way to get where we are going is to feel the crappy feelings- go through it. Ugh! It feels like it will be a looooong time before I feel truly peaceful. We have a lot of crap to get through- I have the same list you do. One day at a time. Keep me up on where you are in the process. I feel like I am going through all of this with a great group of friends- I am grateful to all of you for your honesty and kindness.