OMG yes. Even when I walk into an AA meeting, I'm afraid I'm going to say the wrong thing and someone is gonna think I'm stupid..LOL.
I've struggled with this my entire life. I think it comes from a mom who would always tell me how I embarassed her, plus other assortments of put downs and insecurities instilled at any early age.
Just today, I was thinking back to when I was in my early 20s. I would come home every night from work thinking everyone hated me and cry!!!
Another example is that I used to characterize myself as a chameleon. I could change who I was to fit any social situation...and I was PROUD of that! Geesh...
Now, I'm not sober two weeks yet, but this is going to be a biggie in my progress.
I definitely don't put as much emphasis on it as I used to...but I got a long way to go...
Thanks for the topic Judith!
Denise