I know where you're at
Hey Kevin- My name is Rob. I have been exactly where you are right now....I too lost everything that meant anything to me..all behind drugs and alcohol. I lost my marraige of 13 years, custody of 2 beautiful children, my home, my car, all my posessions were pawned os sold for dope, Everything gone...I rented rooms in peoples basements ...6 in one year...I stole to eat and to drink....I did shameful terrible things to people.....BUT...it got better. I am now re-married..2 step-kids..my own kids every other weekend and holidays. Am back in good standing at work, having been caught drunk on the job 3 years ago....live in a house, not a room. I'm human again...not the animal I'd become. Thing is....you got to reach out for help....you will not succeeed on your own...I tried literally for decades to control it and stop it....I failed miserably with more pain and loss each time....CALL SOMEONE....call the hospital if you need to...you have to break the cycle now...somehow