Actually, you are right, AH does have a child too, and he can also take that baby to meetings with him. You can both go to your meetings and alternate with who takes the baby. We've got a couple in our NA area (actually we used to; the man is now using again) who do this - one or another of them will show up with the baby. sure, its distracting. But most people are fine with this becuase they understand its about bringing the baby or not going at all.
When I got clean the first tiime, at the age of 24 (many years ago) I was totally wrapped up in my recovery, my meetings, my friends.... I was totally self-centered just like when I was using! But my parents gave me a couple of years before they got on my case about contributing more to the family. I wouldn't ask for him to cut back for at least a year - if you do you will set up a thing where he feels its you or his recovery - and if he's really in recovery that's what he'll choose. Then you will both have resentment against each other. Still, I'd bring up the idea of sharing the "taking the kid" to meetings task - since your recovery is just as important as his recovery.