For me, it was not so hard to let go of the person my husband had become. It was agonizing to let go of the dream. In my mind I had it all planned out how my (our) life was going to be. And he had the nerve to not follow my plan, lol. I spent way too many years of my life thinking "if only." My wants, needs, vision of the future was all tangled up and dependent on him. It was really, really, really, hard to let that go. That is what I cried the most over. My vision of the future has changed dramatically. It's no longer about me as part of an "us." It's about me. There is room for others, and even a romantic partner, but it's not going down in flames if I don't have someone else in my life. It's been a huge shift in my thinking and didn't happen overnight. I once read on here that everything we codependents let go of has claw marks on it. So true.
Please make yourself a priority and stay safe. ((()))
L