Galnva
What I see in your posts are some very positive steps you have taken to ensure YOUR health and well-being.
When he started quacking you detached. Not once, but every time he quacked. You recognize that you are vulnerable to what he says, but obviously your now can also see very quicky when he is trying to manipulate you - and you detach. Way to go.
You are taking time off work for health reasons. That means you recognize that this is making you sick to the extent that you have jeopardized your job. And you are taking time to get help and heal. Terrific thing to do!!!
I know with my son that I can be so overwhelmed by HIS disease, that I don't even recognize how far I have come in MY recovery. And, if I am not careful, I can let my recovery slip. I have made a commitment to myself to work hard and maintain or move forward in my recovery, no matter what. And sometimes that really hurts (I call it growing pains), and sometimes it is very very difficult, and sometimes it doesn't work at all but at least I know I am aware and am trying.
You have come a long way, and the journey is not over, but we are allowed to rest and rebuild our strength along the way. And you are taking time and action to rebuild your strength. And the healing will come, slowly at first, but you will heal.
My prayers are with you. May you have peace.
Hugs