All my life I have been too serious and I thought responsible for others more than myself. I knew my drinking was making me irresponsible to myself and others....but to admit it was something else. Plus the whole idea of owning my part of situations was hard to do.
After I sobered up and got help for my depression, I found myself again and worked to get myself back to a responsible person that could enjoy life and other people. :comfort
I wanted to be rid of my shame and behaviors that drove people away from me...especially my family. I had lost weight and had this very red face with sore places that looked revolting. I told people that I had adult acne when I actually had a red face because I was allergic to the alcohol I put into my body every day.
It took nine months of sobriety before my red face went away...just like my doc told me when I asked him. That was one great reward for me when my red face was gone.
I now know what responsibilities are mine and take action when I need to. Our kids are all raised and on their own and now we have grandkids coming to visit. Life is so good being sober.
kelsh