(((((((Devastated))))))))
I'm Linda and the mom of a 26 yo addict son.
He doesn't work a recovery program, has never been to rehab, and doesn't attend 12 step meetings. What stopped him from shooting heroin into his veins?
Me pressing charges 2 years ago for robbing my house and him spending 6 months in the county prison. He still smokes pot and did drink alot when he first got out, but I learned 3 things....
1. I didn't cause it
2. I can't control it
3. I can't cure it.
I love my son and we talk daily. I thank God daily that he's not using the drug he use to use, but I CAN'T live in the same house with him. lol
No way.
I'm sorry for your pain, sweetie. I truly am. Do you have children with this man?
Where do you want to be in 5 years? He!!, make it 1. What do you want to be doing in a year?
I drove myself crazy with my son. The only thing that saved me was soberrecovery and going to alanon meetings. I learned to stop focusing on him, his disease of addiction, and how not, to enable his addiction.
I learned to step back, focus on me, and give my son over to my HP, which, I believe, to be God.
Now, my son is doing alot better. He's in a relationship with a mature, older, and non addicted woman, who keeps him
wanting to stay clean.
I don't ask for more than that, anymore. Life on life's terms and one day at a time.
It's all I can do.
So....
You need to start by taking baby steps to ensure these things in your life.
If you love him, stay. Be prepared by reading here, attending meetings, and read literature about addiction, recovery, codependency, ect., and keep coming back.
This is a great place to share, get support, prayers, and hugs.
A new sr buddy,