Al-Anon taught me......I have choices. I get to make up my mind on what I feel like doing or not doing for others one day at a time. I like when someone enjoys taking care of me in some way....very nuturing. I also like that I can do that for myself.
Sometimes I've got lots to give. Sometimes not. If someone's expecting me to do for them, I'm probably going to disappoint them at some point, because I give for fun and for free these days. The same has to be true for others.
Al-Anon really helped me learn that I never need to do for someone else what they are capable of doing for themselves. No guilt.
If someone is so sick that they can't do for themselves....then they need help. I'm not the doctor in the house......or a sponsor......or the therapist. This is nice because it's helped me feel good about my roles and responsibilities toward others.
Personally, if someone doesn't agree.....wants more......complains excessively......then I've learned to let go of the relationship and/or limit them to small doses of my attention.