Originally Posted by
DetachMe9 
I also want to add that I hope others who are considering attending AlAnon or are currently attending (like myself) don't take your statement about being "sad and pathetic" personally. Everyone who makes their way to a meeting has a different story or agenda about their particular alcoholic, but all of us need support on our respective journeys.
Sorry -that was a poor choice of words on my part. I can empathize with their sadness and take pity on those people because I was briefly living it myself. I suppose that is why I used those words because I was sad and pathetic myself - I truly was. It was only once I got out and took a long hard look at the REALITY of my situation and the extremely small odds I had of ever getting him to recover and how much my life improved when I was no longer being pulled down by the disease - that I was able to see what almost happened to me and my life.
People do need support during each of their journeys - I just chose to get it from my family and friends. I did not want support from people who chose to stay with active alcoholics - and just about everyone in the various groups I went to did just that. The few that left - were also very sad people. Personally I needed to purge it and then try to put it behind me. Talking about it after a while no longer helped.
Hearing that he just died has brought back SO MUCH of the painful memories - but eventually that will fade away.