Thank you for sharing your story. I lost my boyfriend in a similar way five months ago. The scars will heal in time but our lives are forever changed as a result of our interactions with alcoholics.
The saddest part about looking around the room in Alanon and seeing all the sad, pathetic faces is knowing that this life wasn't forced upon the partners of alcoholics. They choose to live that way. Hopefully, in time Alanon will help them understand that.