Frankly, that just touches my heart so deeply and my prayers go out for Jerry and for his son also.
I know his heart breaks just as mine did and the only thing that helped me was to go to meetings and begin working a program that took away my pain and replaced it with hope and healthy living.
If Jerry hasn't been to any meetings of Naranon, Alanon or CoDA, maybe suggest he give it a try, I promise that it helps more than he could know.
And if he does go to meetings, I pray that he'll find that peace that so many of us troubled parents have found.
Jerry is blessed to have someone as understanding as you in his life.
Hugs