Hi Spring 11,
The first Rehab I went to was co-ed and boy did I ever have fun....I was away from hubby and family for 30 days and had only myself to be responsible. I did meet a man there that I would talk with on all breaks. We would discuss anything and everything and depend on each other. I had gone directly from home to marriage without being on my own. I thought I had missed a lot. I didn't though. We did look each other up when I separated from my husband and went to my Mom & Dads and it was all different then. He had gone back to an old girlfriend and I had given up on men. He called me once to go to court for another DUI to be a character witness for him. He said he got the DUI when he was coming to visit me.....yeah...he was an alcoholic dependent on anyone that would help take care of him.
As Ann said, it is common to form friends and relationships in rehab but we are all still sick there. The second treatment Rehab was all women...twelve of us at any one time...sometimes less. I made friends with two woman there that were my age. There were a lot of young gals and also two gals from the county jail.
My point is that I developed a friendship with another man that was just as sick as I was....when I didn't have guys distracting me I did much better.
Your husband might be seeking this woman out because he thinks "She really knows what I am going through and understands what I need." Wrong...he isn't in a good place to make life decisions yet. He probably feels excited by the whole process and usually if a Rehab has male and females they are not allowed to make contact with each other, and if they do, and keep on, they are asked to leave because they are not following the rules.
I can just explain what happened to me and how foolish I was. In the first Rehab I felt like a FREE young woman with lots of friends. Which was true at the time, but I needed to be working on my Program of AA and learning tools to help me stay sober. Instead all I waited for was breaks, smokes, & a distinguished drunk.