Do not give up, keep trying!
I need to change my life - to change the things I can, me.
Excellent, I have heard it said and for me it applies "Change I must. or die I will."
Good News: It was a reminder that I still want to be sober and will be going to an AA meeting.
It saved this old drunks butt, as already suggested, you need to take your self to the meeting and meet your friend there, one newcomer only equals one chance of wanting to get a drink after the meeting driving home alone, 2 newcomers doubles the chances!
In regards to driving drunk and saying you will never do it again........ hon I am sure you are just as sincere in that promise as I was........ if you continue to drink that sincerity will become just like mine and you will eventually start to drin and drive and drive drunk.
I am not proud of this at all, but I have driven so drunk that I had to close one eye to where there were only one set of lines on the road.