Hi point. Can I just tell you I could be your wife? That doesn't excuse her affair and I highly suggest marital counselling (it brought my marriage back from the brink), but I understand her. She very well could have done it from lonliness and was seeking attention she felt she was not getting at home. Instead of an affair for me, I turned to substances.
I have been married 20 years to a wonderful man. We own our own business. The problem? We own our own business. He has wonderful long timers who are capable of running the place if he took a day off; you know what? His last day off was August 31st.
When I was home sick one day and he HAD to pick the kids up at the bus stop, the driver had to call me to make sure it was OK, because she didn't know he was their dad.
Sometimes I feel so lonely I could scream. When he finally does come home I give him dinner, and we chat, but underneath it all is a burning resentment because, and listen very carefully to this - Based on his actions and not his words, we are SECOND to his job. He can tell me all he wants this is not so, but if it were true, he would be home sometimes. We live in a small town; he's not having an affair; he really is working; his affair IS his job.
I asked him one time if he was dying who did he think would be crying at his bedside; his customers or his family? Sometimes I wonder.
I am so sorry about your current situation. But read my words and read them well. I'm sure your wife could have written them.