(((never)))
I admire you for your strength to post your deepest feelings. That's a very hard thing to do. For me, I realized, my workaholic state came from me running away from my life. I also don't remember alot of my kids special moments. I was either working, or so tired. Thank God for cameras. Please, keep talking, and if the feelings don't get better, see a doctor. You don't have to stay on anti-depressants forever. Just to get you over the hump. Please don't ever feel that you have done wrong by your child. You did the best you could, and I applaud you for getting out of situation you were in. In my view, you are such a strong woman, who just happens to need a break from being strong.
I am thinking of you, and hope you feel better.
XXXOOO