Hi Easeful,
I have been in a simular spot with my son and just stopped sending him money. He still was able to get drunk or high even when he didn't have money because of the type of kids he hung out with. I also am a recovering alcoholic so understand some of what goes on with the kids.
I helped my son by listening and we would go to AA together once in a while but not a thing helped him...treatment..mental health counseling for depression...and he finally tried suicide and failed. Now he has a miserable life of his own making. It is hard for me but his Dad and I give a lot of support but no money even now.
He gets a pension from the Navy and Social Security to live on and of course all the meds and supplies he needs from the VA Hospital. He has to pay for caregivers out of his income so doesn't have a lot at the end of the month but seems to make it.
He is sick with an illness and understands this. He is on pain meds and I noticed he does still buy some alcohol, although I have only smelled alcohol on his breath once since he has been out of the hospital.
I do agree with "you can lead a horse to water but can't make him drink."
Please keep posting and if possible Alanon might be a help to you.
Kelsh