I guess what I have learned is that there is always going to be some form of BS wherever you go and that is just the way that life is. I don't have to be a part of it though.
BINGO!!! Life on it's own terms.
We addicts are generally a sick bunch. It can take years to recognize and correct some of the messed up things that make us who we are. Just because we put down the dope doesn't mean we're cured. The same stuff that caused many of us to use in the first place tends to haunt many of us long after we get clean. Lying, cheating, stealing, gossiping, arrogance, fighting, etc... these manifestations of our characters can sometimes be arrested, only to pop back up later and create unmanageability (for ourselves & others). I guess that's why they teach us that staying clean isn't enough. It never feels good to have people saying things that aren't true about us. I was told to always consider the source (try to understand instead of being understood), see it for what it is, and let it go. If it makes you feel any better...they said the same thing about me at one time. Remember, how we walk this thing says more than words can ever express. The proof of our recovery is in how we live.
For me, self-acceptance is the key because the truth requires no defense.