Taz, I think you know that I am firmly 12 Step. I tried other things, and I could never stay away from booze or any other substance for long.
I grew up in a family with more than its share of drunks. A number of them died from the disease or as a result of not being able to live with the disease (suicide). My father, at his death, was just a week shy of twenty-four & a half years sober without AA. Chemically sober, that is.
Oh, there were differences in my dad after he stopped drinking. His inhibitions without booze kept him from being as outwardly violent. He could still strike you down with his mouth in one good shot, though. The only period I remember him being really happy in all that time was when I moved back home and gave birth to my son. My son seemed to become his purpose, and he was better for awhile.
I'm not going to call him a dry drunk. I'm just saying -- he stayed away from booze, but sobering up without anything else didn't do him (or those around him) a whole lot of good. Fewer things were broken, and there weren't any more fists flying, but he never found any lasting "happy, joyous and free."
A number of his drinking buddies who were a lot like him while drinking got sober in AA. They became different people. Happy people. Pleasant people to be around.
I'm not saying that AA is the only way to find happiness or a decent life. I just know that without it, my father and those closest to him didn't get to experience the kind of life I would have wished for him. Then again, I'm assuming that even he didn't like himself the way he was.
My two cents.
(Didja get cake yesterday?
Oh, btw...today is my hubby's five years anniversary. Former atheist, narcissist, all around drunken a**hole, sober five years in Alcoholics Anonymous. Termed now, "Hell of a nice guy.")
Peace & Love,
Sugah