Anyway that is enough for now. Thanks again for all your posts. It is so encouraging to know I am not the only one going through all of this and it gives me courage to make the changes in my life that are long overdue.
Welcome to SR! So glad that you have found us! Keep posting and coming back-even check out the stickies at the top of the forum.
You are not alone and as embrace said "you never have to be again". I sense that you are aware which is one of the biggest steps and gifts that we can give to ourselves is acceptance-you have accepted he is not going to be in control and it sounds as if you are on your way to accepting your part in this by keeping yourself in the fog! Get out of the fog......listen to you...maybe check out an Al-Anon meeting or two or three and keep coming here!
It is amazing when we get a glimpse of reality...but the real work comes with staying in reality and caring for ourselves! You can do it! We are here for you!!
My XABF use to put glasses in the sink-the cocktail glasses (Forget what they call them?) and I would ask if he was drinking again and he would say "No I had soda" I could smell it in the glass and on him! Yeah HELLO! I was blind because eventually he had me thinking it really was soda! I knew I was not crazy (the fog started to lift) and I learned eventually to say ok then....but before that I allowed myself to get caught up in his drinking, his problem/s.....we all have choices and I know this now his choice is to keep drinking and destroy his life (notice the HIS) my choice is to live and live freely with no more chaos!
What is your choice?
