Hi, brdlvr - I'm glad you're back with us. I've followed your situation from the beginning and I am so happy you have detached and learned to see your ex for what he is. Ah yes, the endless manipulation that they believe they can wave like a magic wand, and VOILA! we will go running into their arms. Yeah, right ...
B.S. is just that B.S. - and it smells bad too. He wants you back. The last time I read about recovery (today, as a matter of fact), I don't recall anyone's sobriety being subject to negotiation. Only hostage-taking is subject to negotiation.
If he wants it, he'll have to want it for him. The next time he suggests you find him a rehab facility, suggest he pick up a local phone book, look up a place, and use his fingers to punch buttons on a device commonly referred to as a telephone.
Maybe someday he'll make the connection between his life going down the crapper and his drinking. Then again, maybe not. It sounds as if you really understand that it's HIS problem, even though understanding why he'd trash his life for booze is hard to understand. I think all of us who aren't addicts grapple with that everyday.
I'm glad you're back and you sound so much better. You go, girl!!!