...and I sometimes feel I should not go on a trip, as he doesn't like to travel. Because of his lack of motivation, he also can't afford to do many things that normal people would be able to afford. I don't know what to do.
Well... what do YOU want?
What sort of life do you have today? How does that compare to the one you thought you might have?
If you like to travel, will he allow you to travel alone or with other friends?
If he won't "allow" you to travel, how does that make you feel? What other events and activities will he not "allow"?
Where do you see yourself in a year? In five years?
Addiction is chronic and progressive. That means that it is present at all times - even when we stop using the mind/mood altering substances. And it means it gets worse over time... even if we don't use substances.
I have not drank in over 20years... but if I go back out, I would bet good money that within only months, I would likely be AS bad an alcoholic as if I had never quit. I say this after having seen this happen in others, and by listening and watching others who have made this choice.
What does this man bring to the relationship? Love? Kindness?
It doesn't sound kind or loving to me that he wants you to rearrange YOUR likes and desires to fit HIS needs.
What I've discovered is that I am attracted to alcoholics and addicts. All of the men in my life, and most of the women share this trait, and one other thing.... they are friends with me.
There is something about me that allows addicts and alcoholics to be in a relationship with me. Over time, I've discovered it was my lack of boundaries.
You might consider taking a look at your personal boundaries in relation to this man and ask yourself if this relationship meets YOUR needs.
And keep posting - you are with friends.
(((hugs)))