hbb

Hi there, sorry your feeling this way. I've read your posts and know how you feel. Once i got past the obsession phase is when i started to clear my head and as the fog lifted in my own head i have started seeing things more clearly. The best thing i can suggest to you is work on YOU. He's away getting better and i've read enough here to know if your not working a program or getting better yourself it will be tough.

I don't mean for this to come across wrong, but why does this relationship HAVE to work so badly, it sounds like you give, give, give to get what in return (which i did myself)? I would have loved things to work out with me and J but i finally got to a point that it was out of my hands, i couldn't fix him and have let the cards fall where they may. You are a beautiful girl with alot of potential and love to give. Jeeze, i just re-read that and should apply to myself! I"m not trying to by a hypocrite here but reading your story i can relate. I would suggest NO contact or minimal, i think that has SAVED my life Don't get my wrong, i love J but he chose his path and i can't afford to follow him and make it work, i think either it works or it doesn't and then its time to focus on ourselves. I've now entered the angry stage and hope it stays a while for everything he did to me.

Like i said take what you want and leave the rest, but Al Anon and therapy and SR have SAVED MY LIFE I wish you the best.