Originally Posted by prodigal

AH was ordered by his commanding officer to go to a once-weekly group counseling session for Army folks who were showing signs of having drinking problems. I got the story from his counselor/group leader who called me after AH's first session.

Apparently AH swaggered into the meeting, looked around, and appeared somewhat taken aback by the group. He approached the counselor after the session, and told her, "I don't belong in here with THESE people. I'm a Lieutenant Colonel; I have a graduate degree in engineering from Johns Hopkins." The counselor looked him over, sizing him up, and replied, "Honey, I don't give a damn if you're the President of the United States, you're still an alcoholic. By the way, the prez is also an alcoholic and he happens to be your commander-in-chief."

Number two in my all-time favorites was what he reported to me after getting out of his first detox; five days in Johns Hopkins Medical Center on the advice of his counselor: "Man, I'm glad I'm not as bad as a lot of the people in that place. I mean, there were heroin addicts and crack heads and meth freaks!" Gee, I didn't realize there was a hierarchy in the world of addictions. I never realized that an alcoholic was a "better" addict, and higher on the totem pole, than a heroin addict. Silly me, I thought an addict is an addict, is an addict ....