Aleks,
I found that for me things started getting better when I went to my meetings and my AD went to her meetings. It did not work when I tried to keep up with what she was doing or what she should be doing with her program. I had to get the emphasis and focus on me and change my life while my AD worked on her life through her recovery program.
Al Anon has been a wonderful gift for ME as I learn to deal with the disease of addiction. Don't give up. Meetings, meetings and more meetings....I still go twice a week and will as long as I am able. They make me feel so much better and my life is better.
Hope you can find some peace and relief through this board and meetings.
Hugs,
Hangin' In