Originally Posted by
chero 
Okay, I can't stop crying. I can't sleep. What if I'm making a huge mistake?
I don't know why I'm freaking out!?
Chero,
I hope you were able to get some sleep last night. I think you're freaking out because that's what happens when dreams are dashed. Your world is turned a little topsy-turvy. Things are taking a turn in a direction you probably never thought you'd be heading. You need time to adjust to that. You need time to mourn and cry. Time to vent. And then its time to buckle up and continue on down a healthy path.
If you just give yourself some time to think about this logically, talk yourself through your options, you'll see this is the furthest thing from a huge mistake.
If you stay with him and not continue to distance yourself he will continue to drink (divorcing him is a part of him hitting his rock bottom) and you will continue to be miserable because you're still attached to him in a small way. I'm not even going to suggest that you would be back with him because NO ONE should tolerate any kind of abuse.
Now the flip side of this is that you continue on with the proceedings. You get a life for yourself. You do things that bring you a sense of fulfillment in your life. You get to have some fun and have some laughs and you get to feel GOOD about you. Meanwhile who knows what happens to him. Maybe he hits bottom, gets himself straightened out and finds a way to earn your trust and love again. Or maybe after you're life settles down and you feel grounded you find a great guy who treats you like you deserve to be treated. Who knows? The only thing we know is that won't happen so long as you are still intertwined in his life.
I think this is a great decision given your options. Don't you?
I've been following your story Chero and you've come a long ways. I'm glad that you come here to look for advice and encouragement. Sticking to this place and the fine folks here keeps you accountable. I think having a support system like this, knowing others are watching what you do, is a great way to stay on a path of recovery. It's a huge tool for you and I think it's made a wonderful difference for you in your life.
So kudos to you for your strength and determination. You are amazing. Keep up the good work.