Welcome to SR!
Here is my 2 cents worth -
It would be better to make him mad at you now than to bury him. I know that sounds really harsh, but if you dont do something while he is still under 18, you may not can do anything later. As mother's we have to learn to let our children fall all the way to the bottom, otherwise they will not know how to pick themselfs up when we are no longer there to do it for them.
I too never wanted to alientate my son and had NO help from his father. I gave him his choice, rehab or the streets. Thankfully he choose rehab!
You are in my prayers
Another MOM in Texas
Lou Ann