Originally Posted by
Pick-a-name 
I have found this to be the case,too,Jeri. Like Toby Rice Drews says (in "Getting Them Sober"
) even when they are not drinking, their brains are still being adversely effected by the alcohol (and the ISMs). It takes about 30 days (with NO drinking at all) just to get the alcohol out of the system...not to mention the damage and thinking twists that have occured.
Started to read this book! Great Read!
TheMissus
sorry you are going through this...
My XABF would try to do the same thing with the manipulation of "I feel alone""I have no one to talk too" "You wont just listen to how I feel" etc....imagine that! I yes I allowed him to ruin TWO of my Christmas Holidays among many other (family) functions, vacations etc...until I finally realized the dance we were both doing and I did not want to dance anymore.(Mine was good at making me feel like I was the mean one!) You are not mean! It is called taking care of yourself! Very important!
Denny said it perfect as always:
It's really simple. Embrace sobriety and we can talk until the cows come home.
Never realized just how simple it was until I stopped the focus on him and started placing it on ME!
Take care of you Missus-there are plenty of support options out there! Jump on what maybe right for you!