Susan, My husband and I were watching Intervention on Friday night. In the past I have thought "how nice it would be to be able to do that". After the show the I thought to myself, "that is exactly what we have done with our daughter". It was not a professional intervention with a happy ending, but it was an intervention nonetheless. We refused to enable her. We refused to buy into the addict BS. We refuse to have anything but limited contact until she decides to try to help herself. Rehab is only an opportunity that is provided to the addict. It does not guarantee anything except a chance to get clean. The addict still has to reenter the normal world and learn how to live a normal life with all its ups and downs. You are correct that some never do. Now, do you want to spend the rest of your life in mourning for something that may or may not ever be. I know exactly how you feel. But I also know that life can get better. You can stop awfulizing. I still have my days, but they don't last as long. For me the key was forgiving my daughter. Understanding that as long as she uses her addiction will make her do some awful things. Understanding that it is no longer a choice and it is not PERSONAL. That was a biggie for me. Your daughter is not ready. Will she ever be? Only God knows the answer to that. I hope and I pray everyday for Megan to want help. Then I get on with living. For I want to be there should she ever come to me clean and ready to live a better life and if she doesn't, I still want to continue to wake each morning and embrace whatever time I have left on this earth. It is not easy to come to a place of acceptance, but it is worth striving for. Hugs, Marle