Lilya,
I have one brother and one sister...my brother was very rebellious (flunked out of school in 8th grade and was arrested for car theft)...my sister had some serious issues (she set fires and other things like that) and then me, the oldest...fixer. Who knows where all that comes from.
I was a big part of that hippie generation. I guess I would be percieved as one who sold out but not before I did some damage of my own. That would be to myself...I didn't have children to include in that lifestyle. Beside's I think the farm country upbringing ran a bit too deep.
I am sorry you have been through what you have been through, but I am happy for your sobriety and your brother's. He sounds like a good friend. Personally I try not to spend much time with people who make me feel bad...even family.
Hugs,
JT