Hmmmm.....sure you're not an alkie ?
Not feeling part of, feeling inadequate, feeling like you don't fit in, I know those feelings well and struggle with them. Feeling kind of like the new kid at school, except I'm 43.
That's why I enjoy the fellowship so much. It's nice to know there are others just like me, who have been what I've been through. I call them "my people" now.