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32 Sure Ways to Find out if Your Neighbour is a Witch!
( no wart-inspection needed! )
Most of her clothes on the washing line are black.
The local kids talk in whispers as they go past her house, then start running at the last moment.
Nobody trick-or-treats her house; not after the incident when the kids' costumes were less scary than hers when she opened the door to them. (She was embracing the Crone that year no doubt!)
She hardly ever gets junk mail. You ask her what her secret is and she confides that she returns it to sender after writing something on in strange curly writing.
When you pop next door for a chat, the kettle is always already on.
The Jehovah's Witnesses never call ... not anymore ... not after the last time.
Footprints on the roof. And the trees in her flight-path have been pruned down. I swear it's true!
Has a pond full of frogs, and you haven't seen that bothersome double-glazing salesman around for a while.
Doesn't kill spiders. Not even big hairy long-legged ones that suddenly appear from the waste-pipe whilst you're having a bath.
You ask her for suggestions for nice walks in the area, and they all go by way of stone circles and strange earth mounds.