Well..i actaully passed the damn soberiety test..
when i was f-up out of my mind and recited
the alphabits backwards...lol
then he made me count backwards from 89 to 54..lol
The booze and drugs was in my head.. i wasn't
thinking correctly ..and the way I was raised ..I wasn't
so sure if that totally f@#$ up in my head..to begin with.
and beats the hell out of me how right everyone's perception
or thinking is...
So I just follow my heart. I felt that peace inside
of me as a child...my innocents my purity.
As life went on..people in life started filling my heads
of what was right or what was wrong..But as
i got older or aged..it made my heart dark and i felt
sick . I had a gut feeling... slowly I forgot who i was...
so i did like everyone seeking always seeking from the
outside to cover up the truth. The way I was thinking
or my thoughts was rampant to keep me pre-occupied..
i became a slave to it all..but there was always a part of
me that wasn't totally gone. i felt it everytime before I
took a drink...it was subtle..but it was always there..
becuase truth is truth. nothing real can be threathen .
In other words i can't think my way into it.
all i have to do is accept it.
I can think of a billion reasons not to...but ya see...it's just thinking.
well you know...it's like what Red wrote on another thread..
" JUST DROP IT "..how if wired..that's my brain..
I'm not my brain..My brain is just another part of my
body..it's not more or lest then anyother part of my body.
I guess ...thinking make it so....there you go thinking again.lol
What my brain thinks dosen't change who I truly am.
I'm greater than my brain...I'm the master.
The brain is just a tool my creater gave me to use..
not for it to use me...or other brains to use me..
Well..just beucase my brain thinks I'm not an alcoholic..
dose that change the truth ???