I am in charge of my actions and I am the only one who can change it or do something about it.
I feel the same way, although I am religious. I have always felt that God gave us brains for a reason. He gives a choice, for a reason. It is up to me to make those changes myself.
I work REBT through SMART Recovery at
http://www.smartrecovery.org
It has helped me a lot. For me, it helps me deal with problems in my personality that are not even addiction related. It has been a Godsend.
And I in no way am bashing the NA way or the Christian way.
It just does not work for me.
I do understand. It doesn't work for me either. Don't feel like you need to defend your beliefs. We all are human, and we are all different. That is what Secular Connections is about.
Welcome. I am glad you joined us.