I think the first step in Alanon is acceptance of your parents, your life, and yourself. Let go of the shame, don't compare your life to other's, and don't beat yourself up for making mistakes.
Each day try to do one nice thing for yourself, to make new friends I would suggest some Alanon meetings. It takes time to open up to other's but I think you will find healing and compassion being with other's who understand where you are coming from.
Each day it gets a little bit better. God bless.