I'm your age with two children and I am an alcoholic addict. I have 60+ days and went into a partial hospitalization in my area. Godsend. It was the best thing I could ever do for my babies and my family. You can PM me or keep posting here.
I struggled and this is my second time in the rooms of AA, but only the first time in treatment. I was ordered by CPS to treatment because I endangered my children. There is a silver lining to that dark cloud. I don't care what happens now, today..I don't have to drink or use to hide my feelings.
I use AA as my religion and it keeps me coming back.