i'm sorry cinder, i guess sometimes we do want to know but don't nessessarily want to hear that all seems well with them especially if it don't seem like we are included in their plans. i don't know though, sometimes addicts don't always look like addicts. maybe he is working and trying to get himself together. i wouldn't automatically think that what he's doing is something against you. after all, the man has to eat, but i know that it would help if they at least thought that the kids like to eat too.
i know that you have done all you could and have explained to him your reasons for not allowing him to come there, i think that makes a difference and you do have his mom backing your effort.