It just eats their personality, their soul.
NO, it buries the personality and the soul under oceans of alcohol. The personality and the soul are still there, however, may never be seen again, unless the individual can find recovery.
(((((Sugarpup))))) the man you loved is gone for now. Someday he may find recovery and someday you may meet again, I understand your pain............................please continue to work on you and what you want to do in your life time. You can still have a great life!!!! HONEST.
Texas Girl, you may be right, he might have been trying to manipulate, it would depend on how far into the progression of Alcoholism he is. I am, however, more inclined to think that he is just NUMB from totally saturating himself with alcohol.
Oh, and I also suspect he is far enough along that alcohol is no longer his first love, but is now HIS MASTER. He is now totally in HELL and will remain there until one of the '3 UPs' happen:
Covered up, (dead and buried)
Locked up, (long time jail sentence), or
Sobered up.
It is a hell, that I pray daily I never return to.
Sugarpup, I suspect that deep down there was a little bit of you hoping that his being served with the papers for a divorce might be the impetus for him to seek recovery and thus some of your pain. This pain will pass in time.
Please take care of you. Keep posting and venting, we do care.
Love and hugs,