Oh, Laura it was so good to here from you too. I need you guys now more than ever. It really is a hard situation. And the "Earth people" that I worry about are'nt even normal. It is people like his parents. They are part of the reason why he is the way he is. Why would my brain give a crap what they think about me or what I do? I dont get it. Its just one of those days where I wish I could wake up from this nightmare. I would be willing to do some research for other options for his back problem, but then we start having discussions which then leads to him saying something I dont like, which leads to me getting mad and throwing a tantrum cause I have so much anger built up from having an addict for a husband. You know, I want to say "I did'nt sign on for this" . Its just so hard. Thanks for being here Laura! Thanks everyone!