the points you make are very good points, and ones that i have pondered over and over. it is confusing for me....the labels.
i guess one way to think of it.....different diseases have different treatments. a cancer patient needs care and support.
the same sort of care and support actually enables the alcoholic, and makes the situation much worse.
so, i guess the rx is different for people with different diseases. i have difficulty with it all, too....i find myself resenting giving the alcoholic the priviledge of having a disease....considering the damage they do....the abuse they are capable of, considering the wreckage they create.....lies, manipulations, self-entitement, selfishness.....it just goes on.
the debate will never end.....as it well should not....for, perhaps in the debate lies some quiet answers that will one day redefine, and restructure the treatments of alcoholics. considering that our current treatments are not very effective at all......let the debate continue.
one very important component.....regardless of the debate....one thing stands steadfast.....the way to safety, and recovery are the same for us that have been effected by alcoholism.
i so understand what you are saying justjo....it is confusing....regardless of all the stats, etc......it is still a hard thing to understand. and understanding is important, for me, too.
the behaviors that an active alcoholic can exhibit and execute upon loved ones and families are so very disgusting, that is is very hard to look at this person and say....well, he has a disease. and often times i felt like my xh hid under the umbrella of that disease, which gave him a socially acceptable excuse to behave the way he did. he was released of responsibility or accountablily because he had a disease. this thought in his head only reinforced that he could continue to do as he was doing. he has told me this before when he was in a drunken rage......"i can act like this because i'm a drunk."