What I read was.... out, out, out of my life! Then this:
"I still think about you once in awhile and I hope you are okay"
From my perspective, a note that is saying just the OPPOSITE.
Sometimes, a relationship is so deep that there cannot BE a friendship and a "happy ending". Sometimes, I have to accept that I cannot make it right and live with that.
For most people in my life, they don't even CONSIDER trying to "make it right" or "let's be friends"... they move on and keep living.
It sounds to me that you want him and you don't want him.
If you want him - warts and all - and are willing to go through the trials and tribulations of loving an unavailable addict (in prison or out, active addiction keeps them unavailable), then that is what you will do.
If you don't want him - and those danged warts - then making peace with that pain will take time.
And time takes time.
Hope this helps.