There is an excellent book about Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. Although is heavily stresses Christian fundamentals (and I'm not "religious" per se), it's a very good read. Many churches in my area are actually putting on Boundaries courses based on the work of these fellows..there is the book and videotapes apparently. My girlfriend, who is also more spiritual than religious is take the course and has watched some of the videos which she says are amazing. She called me all breathless after one of them to tell me how much AA references were used (knowing of course I am an alcoholic). If the course starts up somewhere again soon, I think I'll take it...it's advertised in our community newspaper under local happenings or whatever. I'm pretty sure the course is quite cheap if not free.