It's all about control, at least in my situation. I don't bother with email, leave her alone, and it's like a few days go by and it starts, so that's why the rule is set up to automatically delete them. She get's into her nice nice mode, and as soon as I try to do the decent thing, wham.....she gets outrageous, accusing Me of harrassment when the only words I said were nice. So, no point anymore in trying to be decent. What I left there I can replace.
I never before had to deal with this kind of nonsense and I never will again. The next person who tells me "I Don't do drugs and I have no major issues" the way she did when I first met her 3 years ago, I am not going to turn and walk, I'm going to turn and run like mad.
The things is, like everyone else here, I really loved her and her daughter. It's such a waste what they do to themselves, and in her case, what she's doing to her daughter as well.