upsidedownworld

Thank you so much for all the replies. It breaks my heart to know that people who are going through so much anguish in their lives can care for mine. I did hear from my daughter. She fled the halfway house and went to her bf's. Her addiction to this totally destructive relationship is on an equal par with her drug addiction. This person is currently clean but has major problems of his own. She gets frantic when we talk about them breaking away from each other. I told her she could go back to that halfway house, go and try another halfway house, or come home with me but one of my rules would be that she could no longer continue her relationship with this person. She really wants to come home but she got hysterical when I gave her the last restriction. She started hyperventilating and said she just wanted to die because she's made such a mess of her life and she's let her family down. At that point I took her to the e.r. and she was checked into the mental health ward. She'll be there for five days. She has struggled with depression for years but never been suicidal. So I have some relief that she won't be out on the streets for a couple days but what's next? What do I do when she gets out? I've learned through reading all these posts that she has done what most addicts have done - gotten herself in a ton of debt over the drug (no to mention gotten me into a ton of debt) and then she flunked out of college and now our insurance will be dropping her effective June of last year. The hospital only admitted her last night was because apparently the paperwork has not caught up with us yet. What a mess. I wonder if I should treat this crazy addiction to the bf the same as a drug addiction? Should I not try to control it or cure it? Or should I look at it as a mental health issue and try to get her the best mental health help possible? And once that is underway, maybe we can pick up with the post-detox plans to go to a meeting a day (at least), etc. I think there are two separate problems here. Sorry to ramble. Thank you again for all your replies. I'm sorry for the lady whose sister attempted suicide last night. For what it's worth I think taking the phone off the hook was a really smart and courageous thing to do.