I agree and understand but not while they are in ICU. As far as the kids visiting, I'd say no. ICU is a scary place, with lots of machines, another patient may code, lots of beeps and alarms, lots of machines and IVs. As a mother, I wouldn't want my little kids being upset by that. Denial and saying good bye is not an intervention, it is doing the right thing at the right time and place. The family came to say good bye. Your friend asked for help realizing the seriousness of his own condition.
I'll be honest as an RN for nearly 20 years, if I had a patient acute enough to be in ICU and a family requested an intervention, that would indicate to me that they did not understand the medical acuity of being in ICU. YOuhave to save a life before you can straighten it out. Stress is contraindicated for any patient in ICU, getting them all worked up, especially when they have an active bleed is not a good idea. She may not make it, I'd wait until she is stable.