Dilanafan--The last few weeks, since I have refused to go get my XAH out of rehab for the day, he has been calling our sons. Now, this guy never really had anything to do with these boys their entire lives (they are 29 and 21) but now that I am finally saying "No" to him, he is trying to guilt our sons into doing his bidding. They are simply the next most likely candidates to be manipulated. I have talked very honestly to my boys about boundaries and protecting ourselves during this very chaotic and vulnerable time, but I will not tell them what to do. They have to follow their own hearts just as you do, Dilana. When you are able to safely deal with your father, you will know. Until then, don't feel guilty for putting your own recovery first and don't allow anyone to jeopardize your progress. In the search for recovery, there are simply some things we must leave behind. It is hard, but it is just the way it is.
Loveon2legs--You go girl. It sounds like you are doing just fine. Funny how we think we can't go on without them, but after they are gone we wonder what took us so long. Keep dropping by. Many of us have had these issues.....and we don't hold much back on this thread!
Dakota--Whew, what a story. The amount of drama you continually deal with in your life is daunting! I am dying to see the next episode! You never fail to inspire and enlighten me.
Frankie--I am with you in that garden. I always found more proof of Higher Power in nature than I did in church. It is so uplifting to see the renewal..... and to know that it can even work for us!
Ray--CMC is right. You are flat understaffed. When single parents are stretched so thin, it is easy to have a bad day now and again.......but when you were not a single parent and living with active addiction, they were all bad days..... I think you hold it together amazingly well!
CMC--No, there is no new man in my life. It will take a long time for this girl to start feeling single. There is no new job. I dearly love the one I have.....it isn't just what I do, it is what I AM!
What I have is a new attitude. My mind has become calmer. I am not living in defense mode anymore. Every day is not a crisis. I give myself a break a lot more often. I laugh with my sons more. I am becoming downright boring........and I love it.
And I love you guys,
Babs